Hair Story: Why Black Women Don't Swim - Essence.com

Hair Story: Why Black Women Don't Swim - Essence.com

Going Natural in a Relaxer driven world

As much as it may seem great going natural, I am still the minority, now that I am 6 months post relaxer it is starting to show. People are starting to wonder "what is she doing with her hair" These comments I am getting almost daily and it is disheartening. Are you going dread? why are you going natural? Do you have pretty hair or something to want to go natural? How dare I grow out a perfectly good relaxer, why wouldn't you want to get a relaxer? At least put some braids in so it doesnt look so trashy. We fool ourselves in thinking that it makes our hair more manageable, it makes us fit in, it makes us neater and more appropriate for the work place. Even my BF said he didnt think I was serious and joked to his friends that he was going to relax my hair while I sleep. He said he didnt mean anything by it but the damage was already done, I guess you need to be torn to your core, your raw natural self to find out who you truly are, one of a kind.

Its a hit!

This Saturday it will be 5 months since I last had a relaxer, I am currently transitioning and it has been no easy task trying to find hairstyles that look cute, trendy and happen to be good for your hair.

My plan is the less manipulation the better, the less I have to deal with these two textures the less hair I will lose trying to tear through my hair. The catch is I still want my hair to grow, I dont want to cut it all off just yet, I want to enjoy the length a while longer, so how can I strike the balance. I have been doing lots of plaits and cornrows. Today I undid the twist in my hair and out of sheer lack of time had to leave the roots in plaits. needless to say I LOVED the results, I am sure to do this next week again, this style is really hot.

My Hair is like a box of chocolates....

You never know what you might get.. Seriously ever since I stopped relaxing, almost 5 months now so often I am surprised by my hair. I guess the plaits that I am in now take the guess work out of it. But sometimes you use the same products and do the same thing to your hair but the outcome is different. This can be a plus.. It really can be, you just have to learn to roll with it and embrace the fact that your hair has its own personality give it a break and try to keep it healthy and happy.

4 hours later

WOW, I took 4 hours on Saturday to twist my hair, the whole time thinking that relaxed hair never was this time consuming. Seriously if you think natural hair is going to be less work then you are in for a surprise. Now I remember why I relaxed in 2004, an entire weekend would be dedicated to my hair and the longer it grew the longer it took. Well at least I wont have to think about it for another two weeks.

My hair and I continue to be in this love hate relationship, I get so tempted to relax, and with this amount of new growth your hair tends to look shorter. One thing I learnt though is the more conditioner the better. I just piled the stuff on and detangling became easier, not a breeze just easier.

Style Ideas for transitioners. (headbands)

Headbands

I saw this post on essence and I absolutely love them, these headbands are cool, they can be worn with braid outs and lots of bobby pins, they can be worn with pin up do's. I see where they can be very versatile. I am gonna try them after I take these braids out, I think I posted a while back about a headband that I bought that looked like a zipper. But anyway just loving these.

Celebrity inspiration (Braids)

I know many of us find it so difficult to rock braids as they may look too simple for work and not glam enough for going out. I did a search and came up with some inspirations I am sure there are many more but these should be enough to get you seriously thinking about them as a protective style. Remember you can glam them up with some accessories like big earrings or chains. Makeup is key as well, focus on the eyes. And when you rock braids you have to be FIERCE!

Back in Braids

I did some cornrows about 6 weeks ago and I did not like them much. They were too big. I usual do the cornrows myself and use some extensions to give them length and longevity. This time they are back in. What I did was cowashed and airdried my hair, I then used the hand held hair dryer to detangle the roots. I really need to do some videos but then my sister taught me this so she should do one. The hair dryer really helped, I then moisturised with shea butter and did my cornrows. I have been getting huge compliments and oddly enough alot and I mean ALOT of people think its all mine. Sure it is I bought it didnt I?

I plan to leave them in for 2 to 3 weeks. I maintain them by spraying my hair with an Aphogee green tea leave in with coconut oil a concoction that I have, alternating with my new Oyin Juices and berries leave it. I also use castor oil and Alma oil on my roots daily before going to bed. Oh and not to forget, I tie the hair at nights , it can look messy really quickly if I dont.

Twin sister to the rescue (New Stuff YEEAAAH)

My twin sister sent me a package with lots of great stuff, Oyin handmade shine and define, Oyin juices and berries and Jessie Curls deep conditioning treatment and shea treatment, PLUS Deva One conditioner. Yes I was so happy it felt like Christmas, Needless to say I used them all and hopefully I will be able to do reviews on them.

But now I am going to talk about the SHINE AND DEFINE. Now that gave my braid out less frizz and more definiton without the flaky dry feeling. I could not believe that there was a product that could do that. It did not do much in the way of shine but I am really happy with the product.

I did a cowash with the Shea deep conditioning treatment and Deva One Conditioner. I DO NOT USE A COMB IN MY HAIR WHEN WET. So I finger detangle and braided my hair with the juices and berry, long term relationship and the Shine and define. I was so pleased with the results.

Mamas recipe

I told my mom I wanted to go natural and if she had any advice to give me. I have a baby sis (she is 19 now) who got relaxed at a very early age. We were all upset, she was too young not even 12. She has thick 3c/4b hair and we thought it odd that she would relax it as she has 4 more girls and we all went without relaxers until High School.

Well after realising her error she stopped relaxing it. And I realised in about 3 years she was natural again. Well she said she steamed my sisters hair weekly with castor oil. I also noticed that she was in alot of protective styles. She would go to the salon once monthly to get the hair washed and blow dried, then placed in cornrows , single twist, whatever. I think she got some of those castor oil treatments whilst in the protective style.

Up to this day she is still natural and wearing protective styles. I know she is going to kill me but I found some pictures of her hair and it is still beautiful! Sometimes you dont have to look very far for inspiration.

More Inspiration

For those who may be getting frustrated with this journey, myself included.

You've got Good Hair

I keep telling people that I am going to go natural, just so I wont be tempted to relax again, the answer I get is, "you can do that you have good hair". I know this topic has been beaten to death however I decided to watch the movie "Good Hair" today. I thought I was going to get a mouthful about relaxed hair... But what I got from it was, weave it, relax it, braid it, flat iron it, it does not matter as long as you are happy with it its "Good hair".

Good Hair Day today...

Here's why,

I have my hair in a protective style that I like and as it gets messy it looks nicer. I am about 13 weeks post relaxer. Last weekend what I did was started plaiting the roots (three strand twist) and finished the shaft with a two strand twist. I have been treating the roots with a castor oil and coconut oil mix and moisturising the hair with shea butter. Occasionally I apply a bit of the coconut oil and castor oil to the hair itself along with the shea butter and wrap a damp warm towel on my head for about 20 minutes.

The ends looked shabby so I did some dusting and then soaked them with long term relationship. Even though this is a Low manipulation style one might not call it a "protective" style, so I put this in a loose bun for work. So far I have been enjoying this. At least I have 2 weeks stress free until cowash day.

Transitioning

I have been MIA for a while, I just had nothing to say and I have been busy.

Ok I know my goal was to be BSL which I think/hope I will get to by my length check in Feburary/March. But then again I want to go natural, I have always wanted to be natural I just never wanted to do the BC. I want to let my hair grow, I was always cutting it. I am thinking there is no way it will grow if I am transitiong but I am going to try.

I am going natural, I am going natural, I am going natural, I wish I could click my heels and it would be done. But it is hard, I am now 12 weeks post and it has been a fight. But I am pushing ahead, and I will be updating from time to time on how it is all going. Wish me luck.